reprogramming my subconcious

In a message the other day, Domino quoted Paulo Coehlo to encourage writing as a form of spiritual practice. Her gentle urging sparked an ambition to write again. For the last four years, writing has been an activity that required too much-needed energy. Due to the myasthenia gravis (MG), it is difficult to type for a period of time because the muscles in my fingers, hands and forearms will cease to contract. At which point, I have to rest for a long period of time (during which I can not use my hands for anything) till they are ready to go again. So, this abrupt stop/start/stop/start process is not conducive to writing; at least, this was the case for me. Perhaps due to a shift in perspective or it may be that I am tired of waiting for a change to occur, I want to push through this physical and creative stagnant period. Hence, the birth of this blog.

Domino made another suggestion that inspires my first action step towards self-transformation; I am going to write my story as I wish it to be. What would I do with my time if I were not constrained by failing health and restricted finances? A story that I can read regularly so I can see what it is I am striving for in this life. If my mind knows what is in store, eventually the body will get with the program. This could be considered an act of lunacy, but I am up for anything. When I was a competitive winter bi-athlete, my coach would drill into our minds that the races were 90% mental and 10% physical. Before each race, a lot of time would be spent visualizing the course and a successful race. I would see every bend of the track and know how I would attack each hill. Did this activity really help my success? I helped my team win provincial and national titles in the sport, as well as, achieve personal victories. So, if I think about life as a race, it seems only natural to visualize the successful outcome to really experience it!

When I first considered writing about my fabulous future, it felt like a personal and private venture, but, after some thought, I have decided that I will make it public by posting it here on this blog. Even if no one else ever physically reads it, I feel like I am making a declaration of what is to come. I am inviting “the universe to conspire to help me.” So, when I am vibrant with health and financial concerns have no hold on me, I will lead my life as follows (but is open to future rewrites as I progress through my journey):

By 6 am, my days are already amped up by an invigorating round of  ashtanga yoga. On a day-to-day basis, I fuel this temple of mine with a clean, raw, vegan diet and spring water. These are the little details that keep my life balanced and focused. I have to remain disciplined in my practice so that I can keep up with all of my endeavours.

There are three focuses in my life: education, acting (and with that the film and theatre industry in general), and advocating for unheard voices (raw foods, cruelty towards humans and animals, discrimination, human rights violations, children of war and then some).

In terms of education, I am pursuing my master’s degree that I will follow with a stint at film school. Film school provides a great opportunity to learn the craft of directing and screenwriting extensively and seriously. I pursue higher learning not out of a need for credentials, but out of a genuine love of learning.

In regards to acting and the creative industries, I have been so fortunate to work on independent films that examines the under belly of humanity. The more commercial films that I have been working on are a total riot to do and provide a wonderful opportunity to learn new skills like martial arts, weaponry, combat, and the like. 

When it comes to advocacy, I have not yet partnered with a single organization, but I do speak out on certain issues. My main focus is spreading ideas on health and wellness to people through writing and lectures. A subsidized healing centre is in the works to provide a place for people in need of healing but can not themselves afford the cost of alternative healing. 

When I am not busy with these endeavours, I travel to experience new cultures, new sights, and new languages. All the while, my love for my friends and family is nurtured through quality time spent together.

I have a great life where I am free to pursue all of my ambitions.

When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” – Paulo Coelho



Filed under action steps

2 responses to “reprogramming my subconcious

  1. Betsy

    Yes! I’m going to do this too!


    • Great! I think that this has really helped me move forward. Even though, it was kind of scary writing it. It is so weird that doing something good for us can be harder than doing something damaging.


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